James 3:14 But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. 15 This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. 16 For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.

When most people view marriage, they enter it with the mindset of what they can get out of the deal. They think about what their spouse can do for them and their happiness versus what they can do for their spouse and their spouse’s happiness.

This is a self-seeking mindset and according to this scripture it’s a demonic mindset. We’ll never be fulfilled if we go in any relationship thinking about what this relationship can do for us.

As believers, we should operate from the principle of sowing and reaping. Whatever we want out of our marriage or relationship is what we should be sowing into that relationship. If we want to be unconditionally loved, respected, and surprised with gifts, we should sow that into our spouse. When we sow positive things, we have a guarantee from God to reap a positive harvest (Galatians 6:7).

Let’s remove the demonic self-seeking thoughts from our minds and focus on being a blessing to our spouses.